Hello everybody! WOW...it's been a long time since I was here last. This blog was created by yours truly as part of a website that was intended to be an online sports magazine. There were a number of bloggers writing for the website owners, a couple of guys from the East coast but I guess it just didn't work out. I hope the guys are well and ambitiously pursuing other ventures.

So here I am, a forty-something attempting to get through this thing called life (thanks Prince). I try to stay up-to-date with the ever growing technology, hence my writing now...nearly two years after my last post. Blogs baby...ya gotta have one! What's the appeal? The world is ours, the internet is global. Being heard is a wonderful thing. Having a platform to transcribe my thoughts and feelings is cathartic. Perhaps if more people would communicate their situations or feelings there wouldn't be so much drama, stress, turmoil in the world. Besides it's a nice way for friends and family to stay current with my always fragile psyche.

So if you're a boomer, bookmark me and come back. I have so many issues to confront...fatherhood, husbandry, life, death, porn, cars, pop culture, and of course a thought or two on the sporting world. Not much sports though, since my friends web mag is no longer dictating the content I want to get into what we all have to go through day in and day out. And please feel free to leave a comment but remember, I'm not sane so be nice. See ya-

Where Do I Begin?

Hello everybody. Wow, so much goin' on...football, baseball playoffs, Nascar and TER. I'll start with my fav, the pigskin.

J-E-T-S fan, what the hell? It sucks to have a QB as good as Chad Pennington have his career cut short by injury. Yeah, yeah he says he'll be back. No way. You guys saw how he was throwing before his latest shoulder injury. He wasn't the same Chad, his throws were telegraphed but he was still finding a way to be productive. Then Jay Fiedler goes down which wasn't a surprise. When he was with Miami he always missed a few games with an injury. Hey, I love the guy, I was pullin' for him to stick it to his former team two weeks ago but it never happened. I mean yeah, the men in green beat my Fins but they always do. Just Jay didn't get to taste a helping of sweet revenge. Now look who's back to save the team in Gotham....VINNY! I'm sure he'll have some good days but face it J-E-T fan, your season is over. And I do hate it for Edwards, he's a great guy and I'm sure he was thinkin' Lombardi trophy. The demise of the Pats, Jets, and the Bills QB situation open the door for my beloved Dolphins to win the division this year. Can I getta "amen"?

Look who won the NL West division with a just over .500 record.....the San Diego Padres. It was jump on the bandwagon time here in SoCal. Shoulda seen it. All the local fishwraps, sports broadcasts were saying "oh the Padres record doesn't matter, they have a good team and can beat anybody on any given day.....blah, blah, blah. Guess again. The Cards handed them their "ASSSS" yesterday. Can you say "sweep"? And Padre alum Matt Clement got schooled yesterday by the White Sox. It was probably because Matt was still thinkin' about that line drive off his melon a few weeks ago. Damn that's gotta hurt. Bo Sox fan, what do you think? Gonna repeat? Sorry, the dynamic duo of Pats and Sox are all but done for this year. Both teams had a good run but it's gotta end sometime huh? Parity is a good thing....say it with me New England fans...."parity is a good thing".

TALLA-FREAKIN'-DEGA! I love restrictor plate racing! Sorry Mark Martin though I do understand your point that it's really not racing when everyone is on a level playing field. What I really like about plate racin' is the teamwork involved in drafting....until the last few laps when every man is for himself. That drama adds to the excitement of the race. Whose goin' with who? Get outta line and you'll drop back ten positions...if you're lucky! Packs of cars bumping along at 190 mph. One mistake can take out half the field which indeed happened twice last Sunday. Fortunately Jimmy Johnson didn't take out half the field, but he took out quite a few good drivers involved in the chase for the cup. He clearly knocked into the back of Sadler then he tells his crew on the radio he got pushed by Junior. Replays show there was no way Jr. started it all. Johnson has a bad record at the Dega because he's not patient enough. Sadler said it, it was too early to be doin' shit like that. Look at Jarrett, the winner. He hung back until the last few laps. He knew what kinda car he had and just waited. Until Jimbo can learn to do that he's gonna have a hard time at restrictor plate races. I guess that wouldn't be a bad thing....

Here we go....if you've been keeping up with Dave Diamond, I teased you with info about a website called The Erotic Review also known as TER. It's a site that reviews hookers, oh...uh, I mean escorts. It is AWESOME! Go to the site, click on your city and boom, there it is. You can see links to the hook-escorts websites, phone numbers, descriptions of the girls, how much they charge, what they'll do, etc, etc. If you become a VIP member you'll have access to all the X-rated details of the reviewers encounter. The good thing is you can become a member just by submitting a review. Now there are guidelines a potential reviewer must follow otherwise their review won't be posted. Those guidelines are there on the website so be sure to read closely. I know, there are a lotta guys who will say " freakin' losers, payin' for pussy....I never paid for it and never will!" Okay, fine. Talk to me after you've been married for 20 years, have never strayed, you have sex with your wife once, maybe twice a month, job sucks, kids are in trouble at school and you start thinkin'....is this all there is? Then you notice chicks, the hot ones who are in their 20's don't even look at your 40 year old ass anymore. You notice grey hairs in your head or worse yet your hairline is making a beeline south. You look at your beer gut in the mirror along with your now flat, saggy ass. Lines in your face tell the story. You begin to feel like shit about yourself, about getting old. Then it hits you....ain't nothin' some strange won't cure. So you look for potential fuck-buddies, females you think you'll have a chance with. The woman at work, the neighbor, your friends wife who always complains about their sex life to you. Hmmm, lots of choices. Then in the middle of the night you wake from a horrible dream. The stove, a huge pot boiling, you look inside, it's a bunny, a white one your kid had as a pet. Fatal-fuckin'-Attraction has arrived! These women who you think will make life better for you are actually evil incarnate. Wacko-Jacko has nothin' on these chicks. SHIT! What now? In a depressed state you read about a website which rates hook-escorts. YES!!! One call, one hour and 300 bucks later and you've just lived through a PSE, porn star experience with some hot twenty year old who drained your nutsack. And the best part....you'll never hear from her again unless if you want to. No worries about boiling bunnies, women calling you at all hours of the night, your marriage crumbling. Of course, Mrs. Diamond gives it to me every week, if not more. She's my PSE but if I ever need something different, I know where to go. Safely, of course.....

U.S. Open, Nascar, and FOOTBALL IS IN THE HOUSE!

Hello everybody! Did y'all catch any of the matches at the Open? What a tournament....Agassi's run to the final was crazy! Too bad he had to play Federer who could be the best ever to play the game. I'll admit, when Andre played his first Open 20 years ago I hated the guy. Cocky, flashy, all style and no game so I thought. He was an SOB of the highest, beating my heroes Connors, Mac, Borg. When Sampras came along I jumped on that bandwagon and loved it that ol' Pete had Andre's number....most of the time. Now I can admire Andre's game. We've both matured, have families, priorities re-aligned. He's a good man and a great tennis player.

Freakin' James Blake....how about this guy. Too bad he had to play Andre otherwise it woulda been him across the net from Federer in the final. Talk about inspiration. Talk about his girlfriend! Who the hell is she? I want to see more of her. Please someone send me a link to more pics of her. DAMN fine woman there James, you da man!

Speaking of fine women how about Sharapova. She played well too. That match with Clisters was incredible. Sharapova fought off 6 match points before finally getting beat. The woman has heart, fire, and a dick for a dad. Did you see this dude's act? Bud, that's your kid out there busting her ASS, doing her best. How about chillin' a bit. From one dad to another....a little advice. Showing positive reinforcement is always good for your kids. Here is someone I want you to meet, he's Mary Pierce's dad. You guys will get along fine.

So Nascar is now down to the chase for the cup. The field is set and guess what? The two most popular drivers aren't in it. Dale Jr. and Jeff Gordon are out of contention. Boo freakin' hoo. I'm a Junior fan but it's okay. I'm not contemplating jumping off the Coronado bridge or anything like that. I think parity is good for the sport. Nascar is too big for one driver to win multiple cups now. Info is easily shared, the teams are all in the same boat as far as technology goes. All is good in nascar nation even though the two knights in shiny armor are nowhere to be found.

Yeah JETS fans. Here come my Dolphins into town. You guys have won 11 of the last 14 meetings. It's time to go 0-2 Jets fans. Y'all looked really bad last week and I hate it for you but....Actually I said in a previous post that I'm pulling for Jay Fiedler. Perhaps Chad will sit this one out and Jay will get a chance to put a freakin' dagger (no more "freakin's) in the Fins for letting him go, winning record and all. Fiedler goin' off would be ok with me because I know Chad will be back when the JETS come to Miami to play later in the season. So I'll sacrifice this game, for the sake of Jay....and his revenge. They say it's sweet Jay. Go, taste.

Katrina, Rafael,Lance and The U.S.Open.....

Hello everybody, First I must admit I'm in no mood to write about the escort industry today but I promise to get into it next time. Don't forget to check out theeroticreview.com so you can follow along.

Katrina...you BITCH! I cannot possibly imagine what victims of this hurricane are going through. I'm sure I will when the "big one" hits SoCal if I'm here but I hope I'm not. Can you imagine not having electricity, drinkable water, food, prescription drugs we all take everyday? Only the clothes on your back. Looting? I'd be right there getting what my family would need to survive. Of course that doesn't include guns or plasma tv's but I can't blame these people. If all they have is what they can carry or wear...

Rafael Paldumbass gets busted with a banned substance in his urine. SURPRISE! I watched the congressional hearings on steroid use in baseball. I watched Sosa play the "I don't speak english so I really don't know what is going on here" card. I watched Big Mac hold back tears and play the "I take the 5th card". I watched Schilling tip-toe around the questions and I watched Rafael point his finger and adamantly deny any use of banned substances. The one guy who seemed believable gets busted. Say "bye, bye Cooperstown".....

Then "freakin Lance Armstrong" denies reports his urine sample from 1999 contains the banned substance EPO. He plays the "french hate Americans" card. Lance was given EPO while he was recovering from cancer, he does know firsthand it's power to make the body stronger so I would guess he probably was using it. He wasn't even a contender in his previous races before he started his 7 Tour win streak. Does it matter to me? No, I just wish all these athletes would fess up. Admit they made a mistake and move on. I'd sure as hell respect 'em more...

The U.S. Open is under way. My favorite tennis tourney. Hard courts under the lights, Mac's commentary, it just doesn't get any better. The defending women's champ Svetlana Kuznetsova got beat in her first match and Andy Roddick lost three tiebreakers to a guy who was on fire, Gilles Muller. The Williams sisters are one match away from playing each other and I'd bet it won't happen. One will get beat or feign injury to avoid the sisterly confrontation. Perhaps they'll flip a coin to see who advances. No, daddy Richard will probably tell Venus to let Serena go ahead on since she was upset in the first round at Wimbledon. You think I'm trying to be funny? Watch, it'll happen.

Jim, Alex and a bunch that suck.......

Hello everybody. I know the MLB pennant races are heating up, Tiger seems to have found his groove, Tony Stewart is on fire in NASCAR, and yes we have NHL back in the house but.....I really don't care because in August every young mans fancy turns to FOOTBALL! The greatest sport ever! My wife is already rolling her eyes at me due to the fact that everytime she turns on the TV the station is set on the NFL Network. I used to flip between the movie channels, ESPN, and Spike TV but no mas....theres only ONE channel in the TV universe.

Having said that, a moment to think about Jim Kelly is needed. Call it a leftover from HOF weekend in Canton. Marino mentioned the passing of Jim's son Hunter the previous day and of course that brought back memories of Jim's induction speech when he said Hunter was his hero. As Jim Rome would say "Freakin' Jim Kelly"! The guy is a class act, right there with Dan Da Man. You see what I just typed....that is coming from a die-hard Fins fan, a fan who hates Buffalo, New York, New England and back in the day Indy. Those teams kept my beloved Fins from the promised land one too many times. I still hate em' but as a 40 year old fan I now can RESPECT em'. Especially Freakin' Jim. The dude helped take his team to the big one FOUR FREAKIN' times! (ok, no more freakin's) Had it not been for Norwood's wide-right, Jim would have a winners ring on his hand. It's all good though, he's a winner in Diamond Dave's book.

Looks like the 49'ers are gonna throw Alex Smith to the wolves. Rookie QB is gonna lead the team, warts and all. Local fishwrap writer Jim Trotter recently provided some research he had done concerning first round QB's and their careers. He focused on the decade of the 90's but check this out, very interesting stuff.

Jeff George, number 1 overall pick by Indy in 1990. Andre Ware number 7 overall taken by Detroit. They sucked. In 91, pick number 16 sent Dan McGwire to Seattle. WHO? Oakland took Todd Marinovich with the 24th pick of the draft. They sucked. In 92, Cincinnati took David Klingler 6th and Denver took Tommy Maddox in the 25th spot. He's done ok, not great. They kinda suck. The number 1 pick in 93 was Drew Bledsoe taken by New England. He was great early, now? Number 2 was Rick Mirer. His career has lasted 12 years but he's only played one full season. One is good the other sucks. With the 3rd pick in 1994 Washington took Heath Shuler. Tampa Bay took Trent Dilfer at number 6. He has a ring. One can get the job done the other sucks. 1995 saw Steve McNair go at number 3 to Tennessee and two picks later Kerry Collins went to Carolina. Hey, finally a couple of decent QB's.

In 96 there were no first round QB's taken. In 97 in the 26th spot San Francisco took Jim Druckenmiller. He sucks. Here we go, 1998, Indy takes Peyton Manning number 1 and San Diego takes Ryan Leaf. One superstar, one complete jerk who sucks. In 99, Cleveland took Tim Couch number 1. Number 2 went to Philly who took Donovan McNabb. Cincy had 3 and took Akili Smith. Minnesota took Dante Culpepper11th and Chicago took Cade McNown 12th. Two are good, three suck. Finally, in 2000 New York Jets drafted Chad Pennington in the 18th spot.

There you have it. Now where do you think Alex Smith is going to end up? Let me know what you think and be sure to check back next week for my take on the high price of gas and escorts. Between now and then be sure to do your homework. Go to theeroticreview.com and check out the escorts in your area of the country. Then you won't be lost next week when you come back here. Until then....

Dan Da Man, Jay and Porn part deux

Hello everyone. Sorry I got a little behind. My house is just a few miles from the ocean and we don't have air conditioning-just ceiling fans. Last week it got so hot here in SoCal I just couldn't get myself into the office to write. Hell, it must've been near 80 with humidity in the high 20's. It's true, we're spoiled by the great weather but we pay for it. We have the highest gas prices in the country (89 oct $2.80 gal.), real estate is outta control, fuckin' tourists everywhere! The price we pay for 350 days of sunshine.

Dan Marino was inducted into the pro football hall of fame yesterday. Jets fan, I know you didn't LIKE him, but I know you guys RESPECT him. Me, I'm a life-long Fins fan. From the 71 playoff game with the Chiefs, I love the aqua and orange. I'm not gonna go on and on about Fins players but I do think Dan is a class act. He stayed loyal to Miami, never held out, put up incredible numbers with no defense and no running game. Yeah, he slipped when he accepted an office job with the Dolphins then backed out a few days later but the guy is an incredible passer and a great man.

The man who followed Dan as QB in Miami is now a Jet. Jay Fiedler is listed second on the Jets QB roster behind Chad Pennington. Oh by the way, Ty Law is a Jet as well. Yes! I hope you guys win the division if the Fins can't. Enough Patriots already.....I digress, back to Jay. The man had a winning record as starting QB of the Dolphins. He played hurt, he wouldn't hesitate to run with the ball, what the hell? A.J. Feel- whatever, and Gus Fer- whatever are supposed to be the leaders of my team? PLEASE.... I bleed aqua and orange but I hope this happens. Pennington's shoulder forces him to sit out. Fiedler takes over the team and the N.Y. Jets win the Super Bowl with Jay named MVP with 3 td's, 2 passing, 1 running. I'm serious. Jet fan if Fiedler does have to come in, don't worry. You're in good hands. As for Miami, Gus show me what your journeyman ass has learned over the years and A.J.....YOU SUCK!!!

Last week I told you about my neighbor who believes if her husband looks at porn he is cheating on her. I just want to set the record straight, porn is not for everybody. I'm not proposing we tar and feather those who don't like porn though it is a good idea. If a man would rather watch porn and jerk off than to be with his wife or girlfriend....well he should seek help quickly. But there is a place for porn in our male lives. Us males are visual. We respond to visual stimulation. Women are more visceral, their imaginations, their "minds eye" stimulate them. Hence, romance novels. "He slid his manhood into her love muffin...." whatever. So guys, if your woman doesn't want you to look at porn, tell her you don't want her to read those small paperbacks she has laying around.

Obviously, it's a self-esteem issue with chicks. Perhaps my man next door should attempt to pump up his wife instead of ragging on her....which he does. Trust me, he gets chances to check out online porn and he does. It's just ashamed he has to do it behind her back....NOT REALLY!

This post is graphic in nature, viewer discretion is advised.....

Hello everybody. In the sports world Lance won again, the NHL is back, NFL training camps are opening, my beloved (and bad) Reds are in town taking on the Padres who have a two game lead in the NL west (bad as well). But this week I don't want to write about sports. Other matters are on my mind, namely porn.

I had a discussion last week with my neighbor. She's 35, two kids, second marriage, petite and cute, not my type. We started talking about things we did when we were younger. The fellas and I used to sneak into an X-rated drive-in theatre. Occasionally we'd get busted and escorted out. That opened up the can-o-porn worms. I went on to say I still watch porn and my wife knows it. How much I see she doesn't know.....but it's all good. Hell, she's the beneficiary of my porn consumption. I use it like a kind of viagra let's say. Very effective, mucho cheaper. I digress. So my neighbor gives me one of those disgusted looks like I'm the white MJ (whiter) and says to me "watching porn is just as bad as cheating".

WHAT? It wasn't the "porn is degrading to women" card, it wasn't the "porn cheapens sex" card. It is cheating, adultery, fuckin' around behind her back. I knew going in she didn't approve of hubby watching it, he had already told me. But I didn't know why. I was floored and decided to not debate the issue with her. "Oh really.....what are you guys gonna do this weekend? So the next day I'm talking to a filmschool buddy back east. He's 49, second marriage, at first glance seems conservative but really has a wild streak in him. I recount for him the horror spewed from my neighbors lips. Silence. Then "yeah, my wife feels the same."

WHAT? My poor friend. Later I wonder just how many women feel that way? It's no fuckin' wonder the divorce rate is like 60 percent. Jesus, how low can a persons self-esteem go to be threatened by IMAGES? If you're a chick and you agree with this concept of watching porn is cheating, you need to run to the nearest therapist for help. And I'd be willing to bet money your marriage is on the rocks and/or you've already been through a divorce. That would be like me telling my wife she can't watch the Oxygen network anymore. Or no more TLC shows about interior design, make-overs, or fashion police telling people how stupid they look in the clothes they buy. Give me a few grrr to update my wardrobe and I promise I'll look good too. Target just doesn't have the selection to make me into a chick magnet. I digress.

So talk to me fellas. How many of you are married or dating a girl who feels so strongly about porn? Let Diamond Dave know and I'll include you in my prayers....after I finish watching "Debbie Does Dallas 6"